In previous chapters we have seen
John Mellon note that the examples and exercises in most grammar textbooks
are far too simple, and we have seen Amy Martinsen's comment that when
she wanted to teach some aspects of style, students did not understand
basic terms such as prepositional phrases, etc. Combined, their comments
describe the great grammar gap -- the gap between formal instruction in
grammatical concepts and the students' ability to apply those concepts
to their own writing. Unless we can help students bridge that gap, for
most students, instruction in grammatical terminology will be useless --
and frustrating. The gap is further complicated, however, by natural syntactic
development. California's requirement that fourth graders be able to combine
sentences with appositives not only defies the rules of natural syntactic
development, it takes time and focus away from instruction that fourth
graders would find much more beneficial. The grammar that we teach should
be based on what we know about the syntactic maturity of students at different
grade levels.
There is, however, another, even
more important gap, and it is a gap of fear. How can teachers who themselves
have not been taught how to identify grammatical constructions in randomly
selected texts teach their students how to do so? And would it be worth
the effort? This chapter attempts to address these questions. The task
is not as difficult as it seems, especially if students focus on a limited
number of constructions at a time and then add to them. To make the connection
from simple recognition of grammatical constructions to recognizing them
in real texts, students should probably do some identification exercises.
Identification Exercises
The objective of identification
exercises is to enable students to recognize, for example, all the prepositional
phrases, or all the subjects and verbs, in real texts, including their
own writing. Once they can do so, then whatever is said about these constructions
becomes meaningful. The easiest way to get students to this point is to
do a few exercises in which all the students analyze the same text. A typical
KISS identification exercise consists simply of giving the students the
relevant instructional handout (See Part IV.) and a double- or triple-spaced
copy of a short, randomly selected text. You may want to model the assignment
for them by using an overhead projector to go through a short paragraph.
It's that simple. Do not grade the homework! Use an overhead projector,
the blackboard, etc. to go over it in class. This can be done one sentence
per day (or every other day) at the beginning or ending of class, or it
can be done in longer blocks of time once a week (or every other week).
Reviewing homework in class is
extremely important. It does take some class time, but it will save a lot
of headaches and time, and even the slowest students (and those who did
not do the homework) will learn much of the material simply from the in-class
review. The students' work in class will give you a fairly good idea of
how well the students have mastered the material. (If necessary, you can
use short, one or two sentence quizzes to assess their ability.) Once most
of the students have mastered the skill, you can effectively use the relevant
terms to help them improve their writing.
A Fourth Grader's Writing
The following selection is from one of the writing samples by fourth graders that are analyzed in detail on the KISS web site. What, in the context of research and theory that we have looked at, does it suggest that we should or should not teach?
My house is on a corner. It has red bricks and white trim. If you go in the front door you go down the hall and turn left you come to my brothers room. If you go straight again and turn right is my room. If you go across the hall is a bathroom. Then go straight is my mom and dad room. Now I'll tell you about my room, it is pink and has blue carpet. I'll tell you about my brothers room. It is cream color walls, and brown carpet. He also has a T.V. My mom and dads room have cream walls and green carpet. Thats all the bedrooms, now lets go in the family room, another bedroom, my dogs room.The first thing I want to suggest is that this passage is excellent material for fourth graders to expand their concepts of nouns, verbs, adjectives, adverbs, and prepositional phrases. The nouns and verbs are all relatively simple and concrete. The prepositional phrases do not include gerunds or clauses as their objects. In their own writing, fourth graders should have little difficulty in recognizing these constructions, and the study on the KISS web site suggests that, once they can, they will have syntactically "explained" 90% of the words in the texts.
A Seventh Grader's Writing
Seventh graders' writing is, obviously,
more complex than that of fourth graders, but if we look closely, it is
not that much more complex. As the research suggests, the primary difference
between it and younger students' writing is an increase in the number of
subordinate clauses. The only grammatical concept we need to add
to the seventh graders' analytical repertoire, therefore, is the clause.
If we do this, we can help seventh graders master some important aspects
of syntax, punctuation, and style.
To illustrate this, consider the
following passage. I have underlined subjects once, finite verbs twice,
and labeled complements. Prepositional phrases are in parentheses, and
subordinate clauses are in brackets. Main clauses are separated by "/./,"
unless they are run-ons (two main clauses run together) which are separated
by "/R/." "/F/" indicates a fragment. I have ignored adjectives and adverbs.
Words which the student would not be able to explain are in bold.
Note: Double underlining is difficult on the web so the KISS technique is to underline both the subject and verb once, and to make the subject green, the verb blue. |
My brother's nameis Tom (PN) /R/ heis almost tewenty-one. /./ Hehad a brown car (DO) {with a bumbing stearo}. /./ Hehad three cars (DO) {before this one}. /./ Hehad a ford (DO) and two chevey (DO). /./ And now hehas another chevey (DO) /./ but this oneis bad (PA) /R/ ithas park (DO) and all that stuff (DO) {in the floor}. /./ My brotheris nice (PA) {to me} /R/ hetakes me (DO) {to dances} [when hegoes]. /./ And then [when hegoriding] he let'sme go sometime. /./ But [when heget's {with his friends}] then hewon't let me go {with him}. /./ But hecan be nice (PA) sometime {like [when hetook me (DO) to see Chuck Brown {over at the dominion}]} /R/ itwas fun (PA) to. /F/And [when hetook me (DO) {over to Woodstock}].The passage consists of 124 words, ten of which the student would not be able to explain syntactically. That means that the student would be able to explain (thus understand) the syntactic functions of 92% of the words in this passage of his own writing. And, even more important, the ten words, if we exclude spelling, are used correctly.
And now he has another chevey (DO) /./ but this oneis bad (PA) /R/ ithas park (DO) and all that stuff (DO) {in the floor}.Here the student would probably have little trouble, especially if such instruction had been started in previous grades, in finding the three S/V/C patterns. Likewise, the student should have little problem in inserting a comma before the "but." Resolving the problem between the last two clauses would require more thought, but my primary point is that the student, although he would not need to know that the error is called a "run-on," would find two S/V/C patterns with no syntactic connector between them. The simple advice -- to use a period and a capital letter -- works, but it probably obscures a logical connection between the two clauses, a connection that the student felt, but did not know how to punctuate. Thus, the student might want to look at the connection as one of amplification: but this one is bad -- it has park and all that stuff in the floor. Or the student might want to make a cause/effect relationship more clear by using a subordinate clause: but this one is bad because it has park and all that stuff in the floor.
My brother is nice to me -- he takes me to dances when he goes.Or
My brother is nice to me because he takes me to dances when he goes.The last run-on can also be fixed with a dash: " But he can be nice sometimes, like when he took me to see Chuck Brown over at the Dominion -- it was fun too."
The Writing of College Freshmen
I have been trying to suggest that students do not need to learn a lot of grammatical terminology. Instead, they need a few concepts and lots of practice using them to analyze real texts. The writing of college students is more complicated than that of younger students in part, as Hunt noted, because they use more appositives and gerundives. But the real increase in complexity results from the embedding of simple constructions within other simple constructions. The following sentence, written by a college Freshman, can be analyzed using the same constructions that we used in looking at the writing of a seventh grader.
The stage at the Bucks County Playhouse impresses any actor who performs there with such things as the thirty-six fly ropes that line the stage left wall and the roof that rises three stories.When a class of students analyzes this sentence, students will find at least two points of ambiguity. For one, do the fly ropes line the roof? The question hinges on the syntactic function of the "and" that precedes "roof," but there are two perfectly correct ways of analyzing its function. Some students will say that the "and" joins "wall" and "roof," thereby making both direct objects of "line." Such an analysis would mean that the fly ropes line the roof. Other students, however, will explain the "and" as joining "fly ropes … and … roof." From this point of view, both words function as objects of the preposition "as." The prepositional phrase gives two examples of the preceding "things," and the sentence probably does not mean that the fly ropes line the roof. Because there is no reason for rejecting either explanation, the class has to conclude that the sentence is inherently ambiguous.
The stage at the Bucks County Playhouse impresses any actor [who performs there] with such things as the thirty-six fly ropes that line the stage left wall and the roof that rises three stories.This explanation implies that, as long as the performer is on the stage (where she can see them), the actor will be impressed. But an equally valid analysis considers the "with" phrase as modifying "performs":
The stage at the Bucks County Playhouse impresses any actor [who performs there with such things as the thirty-six fly ropes that line the stage left wall and the roof that rises three stories.]To bridge the gap between traditional instruction and students' writing, to make instruction in grammar meaningful, we simply need to focus on a limited number of constructions, and then enable students to disentangle the complex combinations of those constructions in the infinite variety of real texts. It is not that difficult to do. And once students can identify constructions, models become much more meaningful.
Modeling
Integrating discussions of grammar into our discussions of literature is something that we should do a lot more of. Paul E. Doniger, who teaches at The Gilbert School, a public high school in Winsted, CT, and at Western Connecticut State University, sent the following to the ATEG list server:
I often find that it helps students when we use grammar to explain complicated texts or Authorial intent. One recent instance that came up in my 11th grade English classes this year was in our reading of Brave New World. On reviewing the book before I began teaching it, I found it fascinating that Huxley wrote the opening paragraph of the novel without a single verb! In spite of this seemingly odd omission, the descriptions in the text are as clear as crystal. When we began to discuss the opening of the book, I posed the question, "What is unusual about this paragraph?" Few students noticed the lack of verbs, but most seemed to "feel" a certain detached negativeness of mood. It seems to me that this is exactly the effect that Huxley was aiming for, so I discussed the issue with the students: "How did he create this mood?" Eventually, some students noticed the lack of verbs and pointed it out to the rest of the classes. The ensuing discussion was wonderful, and most of the students were hooked. This was the beginning of the most successful literature teaching experience I have ever had! I actually had some students reading several chapters ahead of the class (one student finished the book three weeks ahead of schedule!).The only grammatical concepts that students needed for this discussion were nouns and verbs.
Martin Luther King, Jr.’s Impatience Expressed in Parallel Subordinate Clauses
Rev. King was, of course, trained as a public speaker, and I have to wonder if the parallel construction may be more characteristic of formal oral discourse. When spoken, sentences with parallel constructions allow for rhythmic pauses while simultaneously giving the audience meaningful semantic units and raising their expectations for what follows. In the following sentence from "A Letter from Birmingham Jail," Rev. King precedes a very short main clause with ten adverbial clauses, each beginning with "when":
But when you have seen vicious mobs lynch your mothers and fathers at will and drown your sisters and brothers at whim; when you have seen hate-filled policemen curse, kick, and even kill your black brothers and sisters; when you see the vast majority of your twenty million Negro brothers smothering in an airtight cage of poverty in the midst of an affluent society; when you suddenly find your tongue twisted and your speech stammering as you seek to explain to your six-year-old daughter why she can’t go to the public amusement park that has just been advertised on the television, and see tears welling up in her eyes when she is told that Funtown is closed to colored children, and see ominous clouds of inferiority beginning to form in her little mental sky, and see her beginning to distort her personality by developing an unconscious bitterness toward white people; when you have to concoct an answer for a five-year-old son who is asking, "Daddy, why do white people treat colored people so mean?"; when you take a cross-country drive and find it necessary to sleep night after night in the uncomfortable corners of your automobile because no motel will accept you; when you are humiliated day in and day out by nagging signs reading "white" and "colored"; when your first name becomes "nigger," your middle name becomes "boy" (however old you are) and your last name becomes "John," and your wife and mother are never given the respected title "Mrs."; when you are harried by day and haunted by night by the fact that you are a Negro, living constantly at tiptoe stance, never quite knowing what to expect next, and are plagued with inner fears and outer resentments; when you are forever fighting a degenerating sense of "nobodiness" -- then you will understand why we find it difficult to wait.The repetition of the subordinate conjunction keeps the sentence clear and understandable, even though it is extremely long and irritating to read. The irritation results from the length -- most sentences are shorter, and we unconsciously expect the period that closes one sentence before we begin another. King thus uses his sentence structure to evoke frustration in the reader, thereby subtly suggesting the frustration that made him no longer want to wait. But if the reader is frustrated by the length of the sentence, how much more so must King and his colleagues have been -- they had to endure the insults listed in the sentence!
Verbal Clutter in Stegner’s "Town Dump"
The main idea in "The Town Dump," an essay by Wallace Stegner, is that the clutter in a dump reflects the history of men -- it tells us something about who we were and what we are. In the following sentence, Stegner uses ellipsis and gerundives to emphasize both the clutter and the sense of history:
The bedsprings on which the town’s first child was begotten might be there; the skeleton of a boy’s pet colt; two or three volumes of Shakespeare bought in haste and error from a peddler, later loaned in carelessness, soaked with water and chemicals in a house fire, and finally thrown out to flap their stained eloquence in the prairie wind.The complexity of this sentence, and its use of gerundives, makes it more appropriate for older students, students who have added gerundives to their analytical repertoire. The sentence has three main clauses, separated by two semicolons:
bedsprings might be thereBy omitting the verbs, Stegner evokes the density of the objects in the dump in the density of nouns in his sentence: the very structure of his sentence, in other words, emphasizes a point he wants to make. The three main clauses also emphasize the idea of history, or temporal progression: the bedsprings are associated with birth; the colt, with boyhood. The volumes of Shakespeare reflect the interests of an adult. Thus the order of the clauses creates a parallel between the history of individual men and the history of mankind.
skeleton *might be there*
volumes *might be there*
The bedsprings on which the town’s first child was begotten might be there; the skeleton of a boy’s pet colt might be there; two or three volumes of Shakespeare, which were bought in haste and error from a peddler, which were later loaned in carelessness, which were soaked with water and chemicals in a house fire, and which were finally thrown out to flap their eloquence, which was stained, in the prairie wind, might be there.The extra words add no meaning to the sentence, and they dilute its richness.
Floating Down the Mississippi on Twain’s Absolutes
Complex constructions can suggest clutter, but they can also imply a calm simplicity. In the following passage, Mark Twain uses a string of noun absolutes to imply the rhythm of the gently flowing Mississippi River:
Once a day a cheap, gaudy packet arrived upward from St. Louis, and another downward from Keokuk. Before these events, the day was glorious with expectancy; after them, the day was a dead and empty thing. Not only the boys, but the whole village, felt this. After all these years I can picture that old time to myself now, just as it was then: the white town drowsing in the sunshine of a summer’s morning; the streets empty, or pretty nearly so; one or two clerks sitting in front of the Water Street stores, with their splint-bottomed chairs tilted back against the walls, chins on breasts, hats slouched over their faces, asleep -- with shingle-shavings enough around to show what broke them down; a sow and a litter of pigs loafing along the sidewalk, doing a good business in watermelon rinds and seeds; two or three lonely little freight piles scattered about the "levee"; a pile of "skids" on the slope of the stone-paved wharf, and the fragrant town drunkard asleep in the shadow of them; two or three wood flats at the head of the wharf, but nobody to listen to the peaceful lapping of the wavelets against them; the great Mississippi, the majestic, the magnificent Mississippi, rolling its mile-wide tide along, shining in the sun; the dense forest away on the other side; the "point" above the town, and the "point" below, bounding the river-glimpse and turning it into a sort of sea, and withal a very still and brilliant and lonely one. Presently a film of dark smoke appears above one of those remote "points"; instantly a negro drayman, famous for his quick eye and prodigious voice, lifts up the cry, "S-t-e-a-m-boat a-comin’!" and the scene changes! The town drunkard stirs, the clerks wake up, a furious clatter of drays follows, every house and store pours out a human contribution, and all in a twinkling the dead town is alive and moving. Drays, carts, men, boys, all go hurrying from many quarters to a common center, the wharf. Assembled there, the people fasten their eyes upon the coming boat as upon a wonder they are seeing for the first time.Twain uses a 211-word main clause with twelve adverbial noun absolutes (plus four that function as objects of prepositions)) to suggest the continuous, calm, and wavy flowing of the Mississippi. He then shifts to a series of very short, rapid main clauses to suggest the hustle at the arrival of the boat.
--from Life on the Mississippi. 1883.
We need to collect many more models
of interesting grammatical effects in the literature that we have students
read. Normally, of course, when we are teaching literature, we are not
thinking about grammar. Occasionally, some special effect makes us stop
and take notice, but in the past, even when we noted such effects, it was
difficult to use them because students have not been taught to recognize
the constructions. As more students learn how to do this, these passages
become more important, and the web gives us the opportunity to share them.
I am hoping, for example, that the KISS web site will become a significant
collection point for such models. In the near future, teachers may be able
to check such web sites to find appropriate passages in the literature
that their students are reading. The more connections we make between grammar
and literature, the more meaningful both become.