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Terror
(Joke # 10)
 
     A man was walking home alone late one night when he hears a . . .
BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . . behind him.

Walking faster he looks back, and makes out the image of an upright coffin 

banging its way down the middle of the street towards him.

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

Terrified, the man begins to run towards his home, the coffin bouncing 

quickly behind him . . .

faster . . .

faster . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

BUMP . . .

He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, 

slams and locks the door behind him.

     However, the coffin crashes through his door, with the lid of the coffin 

clapping . . .

clappity-BUMP . . .

clappity-BUMP . . .

clappity-BUMP . . .

on the heels of the terrified man.

      Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart 

is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

With a loud CRASH the coffin starts breaking down the door, bumping 

and clapping towards him. The man screams and reaches for something 

heavy, anything . . . his hand comes to rest on a large bottle of Robitussin.

     Desperate, he throws the Robitussin as hard as he can at the 

apparition . . .

and

. . . the coffin stops!

From The KISS Grammar Web Site