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Dr. Vavra's ENL 121: Lit & Comp
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Spring 1998: MP # 3
A Set of Essays on Foils in Hamlet
Paper # 941     (G69 - 01)
 


 
Foils of Hamlet

1     In the classic play Hamlet [Titles] by William Shakespeare is a work that has and will test time. [SS - 1] In this piece of work there are many characters that contribute as foils. A foil is a minor character in a literary work who by the similarities and differences in what the character does (compared to a more important character) or by simple [sic] being there for another character to talk to which helps the audience understand a more important character. [SS - 1] There are many foils of the main character, Hamlet. Some of these foils of the main character include Hamlet and Ophelia, Hamlet and Horatio, and  [sic]

2     There are many reasons why Ophelia is a foil for Hamlet. If Ophelia was not in the play Hamlet would not have a love and there really wouldn't be a love story in the play. They are both basically the same social class and the same age. Eventhough [sic] Hamlet is a prince, Ophelia is close to him in social class because she is the daughter of Polonius, councilor to the king. They are both in the upper class. They both love each other. On the other hand, some of the differences are Hamlet is male and Ophelia is female. Also Hamlet is a little [more] on the crazy side than Ophelia. The importance of Ophelia in the story is to have a love for Hamlet and to have Hamlet talk to someone lovingly. This is why Ophelia is a foil of Hamlet. [How does "having Hamlet talk to someone lovingly" relate to the theme of the play (or to the characterization of Hamlet)?]

3     Another foil of Hamlet is Horatio. Some similarities of Hamlet and Horatio are they are the same age and the same social class. Other similarities are that they are fellow students and basically best friends. Throughout the play there is no one closer to Hamlet than Horatio probably because they are such good friends. In the play Hamlet talks the most to Horatio which would be why he is considered one of Hamlet's foils. Some of the differences are that Horatio is sane and Hamlet is considered crazy. Basically, that is the only difference between the two. The importance of Horatio in the play is to be a best friend who Hamlet can come to and talk about what is going on in his life. Usually only best friends talk about those kind of things so it is very important that Horatio is in the play. This is why Horatio is considered to be a foil for Hamlet. [This is very vague and could be said about any friend in any literary work. See some of the other papers for the importance of Horatio as a foil.]

4     Another foil of Hamlet is the Ghost Hamlet. Some of the similarities are they are family so of course they are of the same social class. Ghost wants Hamlet is [sic] revenge his death and kill Claudius but Hamlet has no reason to do it until later when he wants to kill Claudius for marring [sic] his mother. They both want to kill Claudius. Some of the differences are the Ghost well is a ghost and Hamlet is alive. Another difference is that the ghost was a king and Hamlet is still just a prince. They both distrust [?] Gertrude because she married Claudius too quickly after the king's death. The Ghost is important to the story because he tells Hamlet what is going on and if he did not know what wa [sic] going on there probably won't [wouldn't] be the story of Hamlet.

5     There are many foils of Hamlet that help the audience understand him more. Ophelia, Horatio, and the Ghost are just a few of these foils. If it was not for these foils I don't think there would be the story of Hamlet. Hamlet [Titles] is a very good play and I would recommend it to anyone because it is a classic.
 
[The basic weakness of this paper is that the writer didn't put much thought into it. I found this suspicion confirmed when, after grading the paper, I looked at the time log. (See below -- The writer reported a total of ten minutes for brainstorming, and fifteen for outlining.) In essence, the writer simply grabbed two minor characters, pointed out some obvious similarities and differences, and gave no thought to how they might affect the meaning of the play.]
 


Outline
 
(1) 
 
 
 
 
(2)
 
 
 
 
 
(3)
 
 
 
 
 
(4)
 
 
 
 
 
(5)
I. Intro 
    A. Def foil 
    B. Thesis
II. Hamlet + Ophelia 
    A. Sim 
    B. Diff 
    C. Importance
III. Hamlet + Horatio 
    A. Sim 
    B. Diff 
    C. Importance
IV. Hamlet + Ghost 
    A. Sim 
    B. Diff 
    C. Importance
V. Concl 
    A. Thesis [?]
 
ENL 121 (Vavra) Grading Sheet for MP3B (1 of 3)
Foils in Hamlet (Revised 11/27/97)
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Audience (20)
 0 / 16
0 - 5    4 The essay has a good introductory paragraph.
0 - 5    4 The essay includes a brief definition (not in the introduction) of foils, such that a student who had not previously heard the term would understand both the concept and this essay.
0 - 5    5 The essay does not simply retell the play.
0 - 5
 
 3 
The essay has a good concluding paragraph. 
Thesis (20) 0 / 15
0 - 4    4 The thesis is recognizable, somewhere near the beginning of the essay.
0 - 4
 
 3
The thesis and essay reflect good, independent thought about Hamlet. 
0 - 4  4 The thesis and essay reflect at least an average understanding of foils.
0 - 4    4 The essay reflects at least an average understanding of foils in Hamlet.
0 - 4    0 The essay reflects an above average understanding of foils in Hamlet
 Organization (20)
 0 / 14 
0 - 4
 
 4
Topic sentences relate paragraphs to the thesis.
0 - 4
 
 4
Paragraphs are generally eight to ten sentences long.
0 - 4
  
 3
Major and minor points in the outline are logically arranged.
0 - 4
 
 3
The essay is accompanied by a typed formal outline with subdivisions to the level of capital letters, i.e., II B. The paragraphs in the essay have been numbered and the numbers of the paragraphs have been placed in parentheses next to the corresponding part of the outline.
0 - 4
  
 0
Paragraphs reflect subdivisions of major points. (For example, more than one paragraph is devoted to a single foil.)
2 of 3
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Details (20) (Please fill in the blanks.) 
[Note: This rubric assumes that you will discuss at least two foils and be graded on the two you choose. You may discuss only one foil and use the same grades for both sections of this form.]
 0 / 12 
0 - 3
 
 3 
An explanation of similarities establsihes __Opehlia____ as a foil to ______Hamlet__________.
0 - 3
  
 2 
The differences between foil #1 (above) and __Hamlet____ and their significance to the play are explained in detail.
0 - 3
 
 1 
The function of foil # 1 as a listener on stage (and its significance to the play) is explained in detail. 
0 - 1
  
 1 
The relevance of foil # 1 to the thesis is explained in detail. [In retrospect, this was a gift.]
0 - 3
  
 2 
An explanation of similarities establsihes ___Horatio___ as a foil to ____Hamlet_.
0 - 3
 
 2 
The differences between foil #2 (above) and __Hamlet___ and their significance to the play are explained in detail.
0 - 3
  
 1
The function of foil # 2 as a listener on stage (and its significance to the play) is explained in detail.
0 - 1
 
 0
The relevance of foil # 1 to the thesis is explained in detail.
(3 of 3)
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Style (20)
 0 / 15 
0 - 3    2 Words are used correctly and accurately.
0 - 2    2 There are no (few) errors in usage.
0 - 2    2 Pronouns are used correctly.
0 - 2    2 Verb forms and tenses are used correctly.
0 - 3    3 All sentences are comprehensible.
0 - 2    1 Sentence structure is mature and varied.
0 - 3
 
 1
There are no (few) sloppy errors.
0 - 3
 
 2
Punctuation marks are used correctly.
Minus Style Penalty Points (May be regained by correcting errors)
 
Basic Grade for the Essay (100)  86 / 75
Penalty Points: - __________ Late          -___________ Other
-3
Bonus points (6 possible)
0 - 2
 
 
Brainstorming
0 - 2
 
  Outlining
0 - 2
 
  Revision
Final Grade for the Essay  0 / 69
Hostage Fifty:  
N.B. If there is anything in the "Hostage Fifty" block, your grade is being held hostage at 50 until you earn its release. To learn how, look at the "Additional Major Paper Requirements."

Student's Comments: (You can also use the back of either page.)
 


Student's Log Codes: B = Brainstorming; RR = Reading/Research; O =Outlining; TC = Tutoring Center;
D = Drafting; RV = Revising; E =Editing; G = Grading; T =Typing

NOTE: Revising = RV. Remember: use only one code per entry. (See Instructions.)

I used a word-processor _____while drafting _____ while revising ___x__ to type my paper.
 

Date: Code Started Stopped Minutes Comments
4-20 B 7:00 7:10 10
O 7:10 7:25 15
4-21 D 6:30 7:30 60
D 9:00 9:30 30
T 10:00 10:45 45
 
Distribution of Time:
Process Minutes % of Total
Brainstorming
10 
Read/Research
Outlining
15 
Tutoring Center
Drafting
90 
56 
Revising
Editing
Grading
Typing
45 
28 
Total
160 
= 2.7 hours
 
This paper should demonstrate that I do not look at the logs before grading the essays.