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Dr. Vavra's ENL 121: Lit & Comp
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Spring 1998: MP # 3
A Set of Essays on Foils in Hamlet
Paper # 579     (G96 - 01)
 


 
Take the Leap
 
(1)     Reading Hamlet reminded me of a humorous moment in my life. I was a young soldier in the US Army's Airborne School, preparing to make my first jump out of an airplane. Every logical and rational thought I had was telling me not to do it, but there was also a raw urge pushing me to do it. There was no reason for me to jump, except that it was what I just had to do. Compared to life, this decision was very minor. Many of us are faced with much larger decisions, with very real and permanent consequences. So why do some of us back away from them, while others seem to just plunge right into them? The answer is not as simple as some would believe.

(2)     Hamlet was faced with a decision upon learning that Claudius murdered his father. Should he believe the ghost, and avenge his father's murder? Or is the ghost evil, trying to coerce him into killing Claudius? Throughout the play, we see Hamlet's struggle with this issue. Many opportunities arise for him to kill Claudius, but he is unable to act because he cannot convince himself to believe the Ghost. Shakespeare uses Laertes and Fortinbras as foils to Hamlet, in order to help us understand why Hamlet acts the way he does.

(3)     Foils are used in plays so that the readers are better able to understand the major character (Hamlet). In a foil, the minor character is similar in many ways to the main character so that we will compare the two. However, it is through these similarities that we are able to see the more important differences between the two. [Short paragraph]

(4)     The major foil for Hamlet is Laertes, the son of Polonius. The most obvious similarity is that they are both young men. They also come from relatively similar backgrounds, a Danish aristocratic upbringing. They also both have some college education. This leads us to another similarity; [Semicolons vs. colons] they both have the ability to use logical and rational reasoning. However, they do differ on their applications of logical reasoning.

(5)     We see this logical and rational reasoning in Hamlet, in Acts 1& 2 when he sets up the "mouse trap" for Claudius, in order to determine if he is guilty of murdering his father. Hamlet's ability to think many moves ahead and predict what the king's reaction will be if he is guilty, shows a type of reasoning beyond a normal person. [Hmmm] In Laertes we see a logical and rational reasoning process when he decides not to kill Claudius, but rather join the king in a plot to kill Hamlet. Laertes is smart enough to listen to the king. However, he could not have known that the king was being deceitful. We can see that both Hamlet and Laertes try to use their wits to solve problems.

(6)     There is also another similarity between the two; [Semicolons vs. colons] they both are very concerned about the significant female in their lives. Hamlet is very concerned about his mother's relationship with Claudius, and he obsesses over it. For example in the closet scene in Act 3, Hamlet tells his mother not to sleep with Claudius anymore. He wants his mother to be virtuous, and he forcefully urges her to do so. Laertes is also concerned about a female character, his sister Ophelia. He expresses his concern over her relationship with Hamlet. He makes a point of telling this to her before he leaves for France. He warns her that Hamlet will just hurt her in the long run, because he most likely will not marry a woman of her rank. He also makes a point that she too should remain virtuous and not loose [sic; a dangerous error here -- some readers will wander off track thinking about the connotations of "loose" in this context.] her virginity to Hamlet.

(7)     A less obvious similarity between the Hamlet and Laertes is the scrutiny that they are under from their parents. Hamlet is being watched carefully by Claudius and his mother, through his childhood friends Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. The king and queen have asked them to determine Hamlet's state of mind. Polonius also sends his man, Reynaldo, to France in order to determine what Leartes’s habits and behaviors are. Booth sets of parents do this under less than honest conditions. Instead of asking directly, they use deceit in order to find out the truth.

[As you examine other essays in this set, note how some writers simply state that Hamlet and Laertes are similar without stating any similarities. This paper is much stronger in that it devotes four distinct paragraphs to establishing the similarities. Whereas in many essays I ask for evidence or examples, no one can say that this writer does not have reasons for comparing Laertes to Hamlet. A major focus of this course is to improve your ability to make a statement and support it. This writer demonstrates here that he or she knows how to do this.]

(8)     All of these similarities help us to see the more important differences between Hamlet and Laertes. The major difference is that Laertes takes his family honor seriously. Unlike Hamlet[,] he does not do it in a selfish way. He takes immediate action, rather than waiting and playing games. We see Laertes storm the palace with an angry mob when he hears of his father[']s murder, and he calls the king "vile" to his face. Hamlet, upon learning that his father was murdered, just talks and contemplates what to do, rather than move to action and avenge his death. He clearly had many opportunities to act, but he was unable to bring himself to action. Secondly, Laertes is up front with his sister about her relationship with Hamlet, while Hamlet waits until late into the play to confront his mother about her marriage to Claudius. We will clearly see that Hamlet's inability to act quickly is a major problem for him in this play.

(9)     What this foil between Laertes and Hamlet shows us is that they are similar in some of their concerns. However, the differences show us the motivation behind their concerns and actions. Hamlet thinks mostly about himself, and how his consequences will affect him and his world. [Here I would like to see more evidence.] Laertes is genuinely concerned with his family honor. We see this when he argues with the priest over his sister's burial rites. He honors his sister, rather than worrying about the consequences of yelling at a priest. [Nice] Hamlet most likely would have said nothing because he would have analyzed the consequences. There is a definite pattern in how they both act, Laertes with force and emotion[,] and Hamlet with reserve and fear. ["fear?" I want evidence.]

(10)     Finally, the most important interaction between Laertes and Hamlet is in the duel in the last seen. ["scene"] It is only at this time that Hamlet takes a stand. However, after Laertes reveals the king's plot to him, Hamlet finally seizes the opportunity to avenge his father's murder. Laertes lays ["lies"] dying, as Hamlet finally ends the conflict. Without the obvious truth from Laertes, Hamlet might never have taken action. It seems ironic[,] however, that Hamlet only acted after he knew he would die. More ironic is that he did not kill Claudius for revenge of his father, but more out of anger and hatred. Some may also note that Hamlet only acted after his mother had died, leaving us with the another question. Did Hamlet kill Claudius to avenge his mother's death? [The ideas in this paragraph are very nice.]

(11)     A second foil to Hamlet is Fortinbras, the young prince from Norway. The similarities are quite obvious. [*1] Fortinbras is a son of a king, as is Hamlet. Also, military defeat and sickness have weakened Fortinbras['] father. Hamlet[']s father has been murdered, and his stepfather is a morally weak and deceitful man. More importantly, Fortinbras and Hamlet seek to avenge the deaths of their fathers. Fortinbras does this by attempting to mount an army against Poland, and to regain respect for his father. This is where the differences come into play. [Very nice details]

(12)     Fortinbras actually takes action to seek revenge for his father's defeat. Hamlet does not. He is unable to bring himself to action, and spends most of his time in a state of madness. The only time he acts decisively is when he kills Polonius, and again that was from a moment of anger. Another notable difference is the respect they show their fathers. Upon hearing of Fortinbras['] plan to attack Denmark, his father [uncle] orders him to cease, and Fortinbras obeys. Hamlet does not obey his father's command to avenge his murder, and to leave his mother alone. Instead he doubts his father (the ghost), rather than accept his request. [In spite of the error, this is still nice detail.]

(13)     What this foil shows us is that Hamlet is not a character that displays the ability to act as a king. He was unable to act decisively, and he constantly questioned the world. He sought a truth, in a world that is not always truthful. He could not act until the truth was laid out in front of him. Fortinbras and Hamlet never exchanged words, but Fortinbras thought that Hamlet would have made a good king. Perhaps in death he seemed like a good king, [;] however most readers would know that wouldn't be true. [The main  idea of this paragraph is excellent, but be careful in making claims about what other people will or will not do.]

(14)     Through the use of Laertes and Fortinbras as foils for Hamlet we are able to understand why Hamlet was unable to act quickly in avenging his father[']s death. He was indecisive due to his selfishness and quest for the truth. He would not let family honor be the reason for acting quickly to avenge his father's death. Fortinbras enabled us to see what Hamlet could not be, a true king. Some may ask why did he not act sooner? Hamlet couldn't, [--] his own ideas kept him from acting. He believed that the world held some special truth that would reveal itself to him if he looked hard enough. The tragedy is that the truth was revealed after he was already sentenced to death.
 
 
1 This writer's use of the word "obvious" deserves some comment. If you look at the rest of the papers in this set, you will see that the similarities between Fortinbras and Hamlet are not so obvious-- few writers picked up on them, and none did as good a job at specifying them as did this writer. Here again, this writer backs up the statement with numerous specific examples. Some weak writers who are also weak thinkers will use words such as "obvious" when they have no evidence and may in fact be wrong. In such cases, the use of the word "obvious" is an attempt to cow the reader by implying that if the reader does not see what is supposed to be "obvious" then the reader is stupid. Be careful in using such words, and beware when you find them in your reading. (Another favorite is the phrase "of course.")
 


Outline
 
 
(1)
 
 
(2)
 
 
 
 
 
(3)
 
 
 (4)
 
 
(5)
 
 
(6)
 
 
 
(7)
 
 
(8)
 
 
 
 
 
(9)
 
 
(10)
 
 
 
 
 
 
(11)
 
 
 
(12)
 
 
 (13)
 
 
 
 
 
(14)
I. Intro 
    A. Jump School 
      1. No logical/rational reason to jump 
      2. Leap of faith/take a risk
    B. Decisions 
      1. Choose between right + wrong 
      2. Missed opportunities
    C. Thesis- Shakespeare use Laertes + Fortinbras as foils for Hamlet, in order to help us understand why Hamlet acts the way he does.
II. Laertes as a foil 
    A. What is a foil 
    B. Laertes major foil 
      1. son of Aristocrats 
      2. educated
    C. Logical + Rational Thought 
      1. Trap for C Claudius 
      2. Plot to kill Hamlet
    D. Concern for females 
      1. Hamlet - mother 
      2. Laertes - Ophelia 
      3. Worried about virtuousness
    E. Scrutiny for elders 
      1. Hamlet - King/mother 
      2. Laertes - Polonius
    F. Major Differences 
      1. Action 
      2. Hesitation
III. Laertes shows us Hamlets problem 
    A. Concerns 
      1. For Family Honor 
      2. Consequences for self = selfishness
    B Duel at last scene 
      1. Learns the truth 
      2. Avenges death of father 
      3. without Laertes, Hamlet would not act
IV. Fortinbras as foil 
    A. Both sons of Kings 
    B. Revenge for fathers 
      1. Fortinbras raises army to fight 
      2. Hamlet hesitates
    C. Differences 
      1. Fortinbras acts 
      2. Hamlet unsure
    D. What we learn about Hamlet 
      1. Not a king type 
      2. Questions the world 
      3. Never talked, but showed us the opp of Hamlet 
      4. Through Fortinbras we see Hamlets faults
V. Hamlet unable to act decisivly 
    A. Selfishness 
    B. Must take chances 
    C. Failure to act quickly leads to death
 
The writer's outline is ok, but it is not the best to reflect the actual structure of this well-organized essay. For example, Roman numerals II and III are both about Hamlet. A better outline would be:
 
I. Intro 
    A. Jump School 
      1. No logical/rational reason to jump 
      2. Leap of faith/take a risk
    B. Decisions 
      1. Choose between right + wrong 
      2. Missed opportunities
    C. Thesis- Shakespeare use Laertes + Fortinbras as foils for Hamlet, in order to help us understand why Hamlet acts the way he does.
II. Laertes as a foil 
    A. What is a foil 
    B. Similarities 
      1. Laertes major foil 
        a. son of Aristocrats 
        b. educated
      2. Logical + Rational Thought 
        a. Trap for C Claudius 
        b. Plot to kill Hamlet
      3. Concern for females 
        a. Hamlet - mother 
        b. Laertes - Ophelia 
        c. Worried about virtuousness
      4. Scrutiny for elders 
        a. Hamlet - King/mother 
        b. Laertes - Polonius
    C. Major Differences 
      1. Action 
      2. Hesitation
    D. Implications-- Laertes shows us Hamlets problem 
      1. Concerns 
        a. For Family Honor 
        b. Consequences for self = selfishness
      2 Duel at last scene 
        a. Learns the truth 
        b. Avenges death of father 
        c. without Laertes, Hamlet would not act
III. Fortinbras as foil 
    A. Similarities 
      1. Both sons of Kings 
      2. Revenge for fathers
    B. Differences 
      1. Fortinbras acts--Fortinbras raises army to fight 
      2. Hamlet unsure --Hamlet hesitates
    C. What we learn about Hamlet 
      1. Not a king type 
      2. Questions the world 
      3. Never talked, but showed us the opp of Hamlet 
      4. Through Fortinbras we see Hamlets faults
IV. Hamlet unable to act decisivly 
    A. Selfishness 
    B. Must take chances 
    C. Failure to act quickly leads to death

 
ENL 121 (Vavra) Grading Sheet for MP3B (1 of 3) Foils in Hamlet (Revised 11/27/97)
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Audience (20)
 19 / 18 
0 - 5  5  5 The essay has a good introductory paragraph.
0 - 5  5 3 The essay includes a brief definition (not in the introduction) of foils, such that a student who had not previously heard the term would understand both the concept and this essay.  [foil as listener?]
0 - 5  5 5 The essay does not simply retell the play.
0 - 5
4
 5 
The essay has a good concluding paragraph. 
Thesis (20) 19 / 20
0 - 4  4  4 The thesis is recognizable, somewhere near the beginning of the essay.
0 - 4
 4 
 4 
The thesis and essay reflect good, independent thought about Hamlet. 
0 - 4  4  4 The thesis and essay reflect at least an average understanding of foils. 
0 - 4  4  4 The essay reflects at least an average understanding of foils in Hamlet.
0 - 4  3  4 The essay reflects an above average understanding of foils in Hamlet
 Organization (20) 
 18 / 18 
0 - 4
 4 
 4 
Topic sentences relate paragraphs to the thesis.
0 - 4
 3 
 3 
Paragraphs are generally eight to ten sentences long.
0 - 4
 4 
 4 
Major and minor points in the outline are logically arranged.
0 - 4
 3 
 3 
The essay is accompanied by a typed formal outline with subdivisions to the level of capital letters, i.e., II B. The paragraphs in the essay have been numbered and the numbers of the paragraphs have been placed in parentheses next to the corresponding part of the outline. [See the comments on the outline.]
0 - 4
 4 
 4 
Paragraphs reflect subdivisions of major points. (For example, more than one paragraph is devoted to a single foil.)
2 of 3
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Details (20) (Please fill in the blanks.) 
[Note: This rubric assumes that you will discuss at least two foils and be graded on the two you choose. You may discuss only one foil and use the same grades for both sections of this form.]
 18 / 18 
0 - 3
 3 
 3 
An explanation of similarities establishes __Laertes____ as a foil to ______Hamlet__________.
0 - 3
  
 3 
The differences between foil #1 (above) and __Hamlet____ and their significance to the play are explained in detail.
0 - 3
 3 
 3 
The function of foil # 1 as a listener on stage (and its significance to the play) is explained in detail. [A reward for the other excellent details.]
0 - 1
 1 
 1 
The relevance of foil # 1 to the thesis is explained in detail. 
0 - 3
 3 
 3 
An explanation of similarities establishes ___Fortinbras ___ as a foil to ____Hamlet_. 
0 - 3
 3 
 3 
The differences between foil #2 (above) and __Hamlet___ and their significance to the play are explained in detail.
0 - 3
  
 1 
The function of foil # 2 as a listener on stage (and its significance to the play) is explained in detail.
0 - 1
 1 
 1 
The relevance of foil # 1 to the thesis is explained in detail.
(3 of 3)
Possible 
Points
Student's 
Grading
Instructor's 
Grading
Description Totals
Style (20)
 17 / 20 
0 - 3  3  3 Words are used correctly and accurately.
0 - 2  2  2 There are no (few) errors in usage.
0 - 2  2  2 Pronouns are used correctly.
0 - 2  2  2 Verb forms and tenses are used correctly.
0 - 3  2  3 All sentences are comprehensible.
0 - 2  1  2 Sentence structure is mature and varied.
0 - 3
 2 
 3 
There are no (few) sloppy errors. 
0 - 3
 3 
 3 
Punctuation marks are used correctly.
Minus Style Penalty Points (May be regained by correcting errors)
 
Basic Grade for the Essay (100)  91 / 94
Penalty Points: - __________ Late          -___________ Other -
Bonus points (6 possible)
+4 / +2
0 - 2
 2
 1
Brainstorming
0 - 2
 1
  Outlining
0 - 2
 1
 1
Revision
Final Grade for the Essay  95 / 96
Hostage Fifty:  
    apostrophe
N.B. If there is anything in the "Hostage Fifty" block, your grade is being held hostage at 50 until you earn its release. To learn how, look at the "Additional Major Paper Requirements."
 

Student's Comments: (You can also use the back of either page.)
 


Student's Log Codes: B = Brainstorming; RR = Reading/Research; O =Outlining; TC = Tutoring Center; D = Drafting; RV = Revising; E =Editing; G = Grading; T =Typing

NOTE: Revising = RV. Remember: use only one code per entry. (See Instructions.)

I used a word-processor _____while drafting _____ while revising __x___ to type my paper.
 

Date: Code Started Stopped Minutes Comments
4-14
B
10:45 
11:20 
30 [sic]
Mindmapping
B
15:10 
15:45 
30 [sic]
Foils / Characterization
4-15
D
0900
1030
90
Rough draft
 
D
1210 
1240
30 
 
D
2010
2115
60 [sic]
4-16
RR 
1115 
1150
30 [sic]
Fortinbras / Laertes / Polonius
4-21
1620 
1700 
40 
 
4-22
T
2100
2200
60
Comp lab
4-23
T
2030
2140
70
E/RV
2140
2210
30
Grrr
4/24
T
0915
0930
15
G
0930
0910
 
[sic]
 
Distribution of Time:
Process Minutes % of Total
Brainstorming
60 
12 
Read/Research
30 
Outlining
0 [?]
Tutoring Center
Drafting
220 
45 
Revising
15 
Editing
15 
Grading
Typing
145 
30 
Total
485 
= 8.1 hours